We Are Not Pitbulls Nor Rottweilers


Good afternoon my beautiful readers, I hope that you are having a wonderful day and thank you for choosing to incorporate my blog into your schedule. Today, I wanted to reaffirm to all of the beautiful black women and men in the world that you are just that, beautiful.


Mass media simply followed in the vein of white supremacy by declaring or implicitly stating that Afrocentric features are “not classically beautiful” or “attractive”, but the standard for beauty is very Eurocentric due to past historical traumatic events. Whether it was our noses, hair, complexion, physique or anything that made us unique, our looks were always on the table to be mocked, chastised and ridiculed. It saddens me to learn how much self-hate still circulates within the black community. As a black man, I have to check myself and remind myself the power of my words. As black men, our obligation to our black women is to protect, serve, respect and affirm them. Malcolm X said, “The most disrespected person in America is the black woman.” I could not think of a truer statement than that. Please think about it. As black men, we do face discrimination, racism, systemic oppression, structural racism, racial prejudices and so forth. However, the intersectionality of the black woman is so powerful that the society tries its best to disarm, disempower and disrespect black women. I am guilty of not always being the kindest to the women in my life, but I was so stuck in my ways that I did not even for a second, take a moment to realize what they would go through. Their personal adversities and sacrifices they have made for family. Whether it be not eating or not buying those shoes they really liked at the mall, they do it all for those they love. Women have the emotional capacity of the Pacific Ocean. Nothing is too severe for a woman. I learned that from my mother, aunts, grandmothers and even my cousins. They are so understanding and willing to help. It breaks my heart that there are some women who sacrifice their own self care for a man and children. To all of my ladies, please don’t forget about you, because you matter too!


Now you all know that I am a Sagittarius and I am so scattered because I am just so passionate, but the point at hand is that black women’s beauty has been a heavily debated topic since the beginning of time. Singer and highly moisturized Shea Butter Baby Ari Lennox went on her Instagram live to further explain the social persecution of black women. Ari has received unnecessary criticism about the size of her nose (By the way, her nose is super cute and why do we all have to have the same nose? That is so boring.), and she has spoken on it in the past, but a recent incident really rubbed her the wrong way (me too!). A Twitter user said the following, “Ari Lennox and Teyana Taylor’s ability to have dangerously high sex appeal while simultaneously looking like Rottweilers will always amaze me”, he wrote. The most unfortunate part about all of this is that the man is presumably a black man. I do not understand how a black person can refer to another black person as a dog. However, he is a product of a society that chooses to animalize and demonize black people as nothing more than unattractive, unintelligent and merely for sexual usage. It was such a backhanded compliment that there was no compliment. It also shows how many men will use and abuse black women for their bodies, but disrespect and discount their physical features. I do not understand how a person can rag on black women, but the person came from a black woman! Oy vey! But, this is Ari’s response on the whole mess.


It broke my heart to see how visibly drained Ari was from this because no one wants to come to a black woman’s rescue and defend them from these attacks. Black men, we have to stand up and show out, so we need more brotherhood, less toxic masculinity, less homophobia, and more self love because apparently we have a self love deficit. Black men please do not engage in sexual intercourse with these young women if you do not have a connection, bond or strong friendship. She is your homie first, girlfriend second. Also, this will probably come off as so primitive lol, but as a man, you are a depositer, so your lack of self love and self care, depression, anxiety, insecurity, anger, anguish, etc. is what the woman receives. You do not want to fill someone with poison. Make sure that your heart is right first, so that you will not damage your community and the foundation of what we call home i.e. black women. Don’t ruin her sanity and peace of mind. Now, I know that there are some black women who abuse and neglect black men and that is not acceptable either. I really just want us all to check each other and hold one another accountable for the traits we have picked up along our respective life journeys. It is not easy being a human being, but we have to keep going because unfulfilled projects do not make it on Earth. We are meant to be here. There is something inside of you that is worthy of being materialized on this Earth. So, to all of my brothers and sisters, because I truly believe that we are a part of one another, I want to say thank you and you are worthy, beautiful, dope, saucy, fly, cool, creative, artistic, handsome, kind, generous, giving, amazing and all of the above. I urge us to be kind to one another. We all face some sort of struggle and let’s celebrate all shades, gradients, textures and hues of blackness. We are not the absence of light, but we are the absorption of light. The light is within us and it always has been. Do not be swayed of the world, because society is ever-fleeting. Be your own person. Own your nose. Own your freckles. Own your mixed heritage. Own your chocolate complexion. Own your curves. Own your body (which is beautiful in any size or shape). Own your acne. Own your hair. Own your curls. Own your coils. Own your kinks. Own it! The love is inside and when you get it, you got it you feel me?! This world will try to dictate who is beautiful and who isn’t, but the gag is that we all are. We are fearfully and wonderfully made by a creator who makes no mistakes. Intrinsically, there is nothing bad, wrong or erroneous about your creation. You were filled with a soul that aches for acceptance, connection, love and passion. I understand that we all work to improve ourselves, but we are amazing. Through writing this, I see how I must lead by example and I cannot urge you all to go on if I am not running with you. So, today I choose to run with no fear. I release the anxiety and depression. I release the need for validation from others. I release the feeling of wanting a relationship that will actually distract me instead of figuring out who I really am and what can I leave in this world and people? I release the insecurity of acne taking control of how I choose to move in my life. I am beautiful because I came from a beautiful black woman. I am so grateful that God chose me to be her son and every feature is proof of my rich heritage. My ancestors were healers, creators, artists, and leaders. I am a continuation of my family as are all of you. So, when you have children and they have your nose, toes, eyes, smile and everything cute about you, you will see how silly it was to hate on yourself and that this child an outer body expression of the best parts of you. I think that’s pretty dope, don’t you?

Anyways, I felt in my spirit that someone needed this to get them through the day, so when God calls, I try my best to answer. I love you all. God bless you on your new year, new semester, new job, new career, new phase in life. You add something to this world that nobody else can. Don’t ever compete with other people. Try to outdo the you from yesterday! See you later guys!

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