Random Thoughts

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Good afternoon beautiful people! I am so glad to see your lovely faces again. I missed you all so much and happy July! New month, new beginnings, new opportunities to be better than you were before. I try to repeat that mantra every day because no matter how bad things get, they are never as bad as they may seem. Some of life’s moments might make you feel the sensation of “This is the worst. I am an awful person. How could I say that? I wish I could take it bad. I’m not good at this. I’ll never be successful.”, but don’t listen to those voices. That is the voice of the enemy because God put you in this world for a specific reason and he makes no mistakes. Whatever platform you have, use it to your advantage to better your circumstances. Whether you come from the inner city or a rural town, you have the ability to choose to change your life. Trust me, I know that it is not easy. For example, when I went through the grunt of my depression in my early teens, I still had a loving family, roof over my head, food on the table and clothes on my back. So many of my peers have none of those positive attributes to help alleviate the many stressors of being a teenager. What about our homeless brothers and sisters? Our brothers and sisters who suffer with drug addiction? Untreated mental illness? Learning disabilities? Physical deformities? I gave those examples because we tend to think that “our stuff” is so extreme, but a lot of our peers go through so much as well. I feel that we must be cognizant of that so that we can just check for each other and not be ignorant to each other’s plights. In this world, we have different struggles, but we all struggle, we are not monolithic. We are an anomaly. There are so many different types of people in this world. As I embark on a new chapter in my life, I know that I will be exposed to even more different types of people than myself. I am so thankful that I took time to “sit in my stuff”, and become comfortable with who I am. I love myself. I enjoy being around myself. I have fun. I cook. I draw. I think of fashion designs. I get inspired by Instagram and Pinterest. I paint. I love music. I secretly love to sing (my voice is low, but I try to hit the Mariah Carey notes once in a while.) I love to reinvent my look. I love movies. I love art. I love literature. Self-help books. Afro-American literature. Documentaries. Cinematography. I know that is a lot of ideas morphed into one. I’m a Sagittarius, so I have accepted the fact that I am scatterbrained as I am optimistic. But, guys it took so much time to… love myself. Sitting in my stuff meant unpacking destructive behaviors like over cleansing my face to combat the acne. The ironic thing is I haven’t washed my face in about 2 or 3 weeks, and I haven’t suffered one breakout. I stopped clinging to others and started depositing into my self care bank. I just didn’t give myself time to just mull around and learn who I really am. I noticed that I would engage with other people a lot because I was afraid to be by myself. Not that I don’t love human interaction because I 100% love people. But, I was putting more into people than I was myself. Please whatever you do, take care of you first because no one else will. Trust me. There is a thin love between self care and self-absorption. It is perfectly fine to care for yourself and practice behaviors that help you do so, but neglecting the ones who love you is when things can get tricky. We all have our stuff, but we cannot forget to appreciate and value one another’s presence. We are all divine beings with so much to offer in this world. Please be thankful for all that you have NOW. NOW in Buddhism means “No Opportunity Wasted”, which means any time you have the chance to endow knowledge to someone, help someone out, console someone or just be there to support, please take it because life is so short guys. We must cherish all that we have so that when gain more things, we will be able to truly appreciate it. Well, guys I just wanted to share some thoughts with you. They are quite disjointed, but I just love to share my piece with you guys from time to time. Love you guys. Hope you have a great day!

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