I Have a Million Thoughts Rapidly Spiraling In My Brain

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Anxiety. Anxiety is your body’s natural response to stress. It’s a feeling of fear or apprehension about what’s to come. The first day of school, going to a job interview, or giving a speech may cause most people to feel fearful and nervous. I am comfortable saying I have anxiety. I am constantly overthinking about how I am perceived to others. My first fear is that I am interpreted as “mean, rude, inconsiderate or fake”. I never wanted to be that because I never would like to intentionally hurt another person’s feelings. I believe that is why I try so hard to be perfect. Perfect skin. Perfect hair. Perfect fashion. Perfect intelligence. Perfect eloquence. Why do I do that? I believe that it is because I try so hard to be a good person because I was always afraid to hurt someone. I am such an empath that I feel a person’s pain deeply. When someone is struggling, I envision myself in that same position. A lot of times, I would have to struggle in private because I didn’t want to be a bother or burden. To all my readers, IT IS OK TO ASK FOR HELP. IT IS OK TO NOT ALWAYS SAY THE RIGHT THING. You are not in this journey alone no matter how life may appear. There is someone always watching over you whether it be parents, religion, friends, counselors, teachers, etc. In this world, just know that someone loves you. No matter what you do or say, they will still love you. I think that I get so anxious because I do not remind myself that I have so many people rocking for me. I get so hang up on the people who may not like me and ignore the ones who genuinely like me. I am so glad that I have gotten better with that and now I know to appreciate the folks who consider me, who value me, who support me. Please appreciate those people y’all because not everyone in the world is kind. I am going away to college soon and I know that not everyone will be kind or considerate or caring. I know many of them will be indifferent, mean or inconsiderate. I have come to the conclusion that… I’m okay with that! I have worked on myself so much and spent these years dating myself, building myself up and loving myself to the fullest. So no one can break me down. No one can tear me down. I am the only one who can tear me down. I noticed that the moments where I feel most defeated and depressed is when I beat myself up. I am my worst enemy and since I know that, I know that I cannot lose. I have so many blessings and virtues to my advantage that I will not allow self-deprecation or depression or anxiety crush my hopes and dreams. I pray that you all do the same! The world has something greater in store for you so don’t give up. Continue! Rise above all obstacles. No matter how many thoughts enter my head, I remind myself that I can control the frequency of my thoughts. Sometimes you have to turn the volume down and act. There will be many situations where I will be out of my comfort zone and that is okay. Getting out of our comfort zones is how we learn to grow. So my readers please continue on the journey. I pray the boulders of stagnation and monotony will move off your path to greatness. I love you all so much and I wanted to do a double post because I love you all so much. As always, please comment and subscribe below. If you have any suggestions/recommendations, I will be more than welcome to get on that. Talk to you later my readers.

 

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